discipline & training

During our housechurch we talked about God’s training and discipline. How sometimes it’s quite hard and unpleasant. Now this usually doesn’t fail to be a hot topic. The discussion was pretty lively with only four of us. :p

Sometimes I don’t know where I am. I’ve been going through a pretty hard times for a couple years. (And being only 21 it’s easy to worry that the other 60 are all gonna be like this.) Sometimes I get a bit freaked out wondering if this is an attack of Satan or if I’ve done something wrong and brought it upon myself or what. Most of the stuff that’s happened hasn’t been my fault but I know I haven’t handled it well throughout.

Our talk was encouraging. God does use all things for good. The direction from which a trial comes does not impede God’s ability to use it to shape my character. He is the one doing the training not me. I tend to worry that I’m not weathering this desert time very well. It’s a well-founded fear, cause I’m not handling things like the super-saint I wish I was, not even close. That doesn’t mean that God’s just going to let me go. He has no intention of doing so - not even when I believe that He’s about to let me drop. Walking in a desert it’s easy for me to get discouraged over this truth and find it too hard, even painful, to believe. Hey, it’s hard to look up from the ground with all that sand blowing in my eyes.