first day

This was my first day working for Starbucks; I ended up getting the job even though I broke down on the way to my interview last week. I learned more about coffee today than this non-coffee drinker ever dreamed of knowing about the subject. We made a lot of Frappichinos and that was really fun. We gave all our practice ones away for free because they weren't always the prettiest things. I also drank more coffee today than I have ever drank in my whole life. It was all black and awful. That was really hard. I ended up quite sick and had to leave early. Arrgg.... Maybe I'm allergic to coffee.

week of car troubles

These last seven days have been pretty hard on my poor old car. Once again I had thought we had reached the end. I was on my way to a job interview in Copper a week ago when suddenly, "pop!" and all this white smoke started pouring out everywhere. So I pulled over and called Bobby and he helped me limp the poor thing home. We had to pull over a bunch of times to let the engine cool down. Having almost no money I was pretty upset at the prospect of having to use the bus for the next few months. Then we discovered it was just a blown hose, not too bad. My dad had it replaced in no time.

The next day I drove it, it was overheating really fast and I ended up having to leave it at Isaac's house for the day. It was only the thermostat so Todd and Tom, Ben and Marie's dads, fixed it for me. Fortunately all the repairs have been cheap and I've saved on gas not driving my car around much.

Today I was picking something up from Ben's house and ran over a nail just before pulling into the driveway. Why me? The thing was letting air out so fast we could all actually see it getting flatter! Todd fixed it just enough to get me to the tire repair place. I was pretty upset, I only had $30 dollars left to my name so I knew this was probably going to cause me to bounce a check. I got the the place and guess what? I was ladies' day so they patched my tire for free! Whew, that was close, thanks God.

unhindered

This was the last day of unhindered, Immanuel Fellowship's missions conference/retreat. I'm not really sure which one it is as this event kind of feels like both. Anyway, this is only the second time we've had it unhindered, but I think it's my favorite thing we do as a church. It's so envisioning.

This time our speakers were George Miley, Pete Greig, and Mike Phillips. What do we talk about at a missions conference/retreat? It was interesting. Last time we did a lot of talking about what church is, planting churches, overcomming our own insecurities, inner healing, and forgiveness. Last time I definately went away changed in the way I think. I've remembered a lot of what the speakers said and what God spoke to me during that time. Two years later unhindered has again surpassed my expectations. This time the theme is baciaclly the same: church planting. However, the speakers took it from a different angle this time.

Here are some of the things that stood out to me:

• Mike said that if we plan on going and making disciples we first have to be disciples. We can't take others where we haven't been and are not going.
• Spiritual authority and power are two different things. Those who carry authority will feel weak more often than they feel strong, but God is looking for people willing to be His.
• Pride can hold us back but so can a more subtle lack of humility. Thinking more highly of ourselves than we ought. Teachability is really important in cross-cultural relationships.
• George talked about the importance of solitude. I missed that one, but everyone said it was really good; I'll have to get it on CD.
• Pete talked about focus. There will be times of failure and times of fruitfulness. We need to remember through both that our relationship with God is secure and His is working in us.
• Jenn and Joel made an incredible video about really loving Jesus more than life and being willing to drink His cup and feed His sheep. What is the cost of taking up your cross and dying on it?
• The desert is not something to run away from. It's a place to get close to God in preparation for the ministry He has chosen for you. We need to see it from God's view.

So much stuck out to me it's a bit hard to sort through it all. However, I think the biggest thing was the humility of the speakers themselves. A lot of people would come to an event like this and share their triumphs and miricle stories. You end up wondering why you just can't seem to reach as high as them. It wasn't that way here, they told us their failures and times of weakness and doubt. It was encouraging how much they talked about failure. So there is not something horribly wrong with me if I don't see amazing results every time I try to serve God. It's not the end of the world if something goes wrong. Overall I think that stood out the most. I get way too uptight about messing up. God help me trust You and risk more.

God's love

Tonight (well, I guess last night) our housechurch talked about God's love. It was a really hard topic to help teach. Who am I to teach about God's love? I don't really know all that much about it....

I guess that's the beauty of a housechurch, everyone is there for everyone else and we all teach each other. This is definitely one of those nights where I feel like the things other people said really helped me more than I helped anyone else. They reminded me of what God's love is like. All of them were things I knew but had somehow forgotten. I hate it when I forget God's love; it's like holding my breath, senselessly waiting for air when it's all around me. Thanks everyone, I really needed to hear what you said tonight.

kilts

Ok, so I'm at my Aunt's house and I ran across this sick online store and I thought all my guy friends should know about it. Get your wallets out and prepare to be amazed by these super hott kilts! I'm especially impressed by the designer kilts. If I was a guy I'd be wearing either the Hand Over or the Bloodlines.

radical church

Radical, revolutionary, unconventional, passionate, unhindered, whole-hearted, focused, sincere. Does this list of words make anyone think of the church? Not anyone who's been through as many American churches as I have. Maybe I've seen too much of the dirty reality of church in America. Is a higher vision than this possible? Is it realistic? Is a person insane to dream of more for the church?

I just finished reading this post by Jenn, a very good friend of mine. I know it's a bit long, but it's anything but boring and very worth taking the time to read. It's a well-written picture of what it would look like if the book of Acts had taken place in 21st century America. It leaves me wondering, what happened to church like that? Could there ever really be a church that looked like that in the modern world? I could imagine it in the part of the world where Christians are under heavy persecution. But what of the comfortable Western world? Could church ever look like that in the Western world? It seems ludicrous to even think about it. Could the comfortable, prosperity-infatuated, uncommitted, self-focused, western church ever really look like this? It doesn't seem possible to knock the western church out of it's self-infatuation.

Then again, who is the God of the impossible? When you read the Bible it almost seems like He likes bringing beauty out of the impossibly crippled. I'm not saying that there's no good in the Western church. I'm not saying it's a lost cause. I love the church. Yet I've never seen it like this. What would become of us if we actually attempted this? No, this is one of those things you cannot attempt; you either do it all the way or self-destruct trying. But what would happen? I think there would be a grand division in the church. Some would go for it. Others would stand back and see something they should be doing but not be able to do it because they love the world too much. Some would find an incredibly meaningful life this side of Heaven like they never imagined. Others would probably continue as they are. In studying church history a little I've noticed that the church tends to be it's own biggest persecutor. Those who are unwilling to change try to force everyone else to stay behind with them. They also tend to flippantly throw around words like heresy and cult without really knowing or caring about the beliefs of those they've so labeled.

It would be amazing to live to see and be a part of such a radical escape from the love of this life and materialism. Could I handle it? Would I resist? I do like to have a little space. But to be challenged to work out my Christianity in such closeness to my brothers and sisters would be an incredible growing experience. It would revolutionize the way all of us think about our relationship with Jesus, our spirituality, our church...everything. God could You make this happen?

ids graduation

Last night some of my friends graduated from our church's private high school. There were four people in the graduating class: Marie, Isaac, Emily, and Ben. It was the coolest graduation ever! (Ok, ok, so I've only been to one other graduation ceremony, but it was still the best!) It was formal and every one in the class made a speech. They all did a really good job, especially Marie. Hers was absolutely brilliant, she was organized, polished, funny, and sincere - she even quoted some poetry she had written for it. Good work everyone!